Thursday, December 3, 2009

Straight Talk!

Let’s just get something straight here!! I feel really, really weary today of the constant discussion about whether our baby is a boy or a girl! There are still folks we know who are just now finding out about the pregnancy, so I get to go through the same conversation virtually every time I step foot in public. I really try to be gracious when I tell people that no, we won’t know baby’s gender until the birth! And then the inevitable assumption comes, from nearly every person that we are “hoping for a boy this time”. My teeth clench, my heart pounds, my mind becomes so angered because that is really very far from the truth, and in my opinion, an obtuse remark! And yet, how can I succinctly (or lovingly) explain all of those feelings to the person before me who obviously thinks it must be true? After all, why else would a family have 4 children, right? Is our society so bent on having everything we want, which includes excessive belongings and being able to choose from thousands of items at every coffee shop, restaurant, mega box store …. that the attitude also transfers to the matter of having children?? Believe me, I am NOT enduring childbearing with some great hope that my baby will be one certain gender! We are not basing our family size on what gender our kids are, either! In fact, if you tied me down and twisted my arm to choose whether I’d rather be buried in pink or blue in approximately 4 weeks, I would say I’d rather have a girl! That’s probably mostly rebellion to the nasty assumption. But also, my practical mind says we are all set up for a girl—with loads of clothes stacked in bins in the basement, and more girly toys than you could imagine. I’m also more excited about the girl names that have surfaced during this pregnancy than the boy name we agree on, though it is a solid good name too. Oh, all this suspense the sweet child keeps us in-- I love it! I love the intense moment of a baby’s delivery when you first see their skin, such a little body, you realize the worst is over, you hold them close, and then the awesome experience of getting to know little him/her just as they have arrived: a precious gift from God, no matter what!!


  1. oh, frustrating for sure!! sometimes in their curiosity, people become irritating or downright insensitive. sorry it's bugging you:(
    sometimes i run into the whole "oh, you have one of each! like a million dollar family... you must be done having kids then" thing. who gets to say we're done except us? it's still under discussion, in case you were wondering :)
    anyway, hope it won't be too much longer before your sweet little one comes and everyone's annoying questions will be satisfied. think of you all often! <3

  2. we learned all too well about people and their opinions, having 4 kids in under 4 years. it seems everyone knows whats best, or so they think. it never mattered to us the sex of our babies. we didn't TRY for 2 of each, nor did we stop because we had 2 of each.

    Can't wait to hear when #4 arrives!! I need to call you one of these days!